Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
