laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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