ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
FUCK WHALES
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
