Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
