There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
