Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
