Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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