Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
