so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
