He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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