This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
