I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
