It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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