google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
