I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
