NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
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