I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
