i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Randomize
