I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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