no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
