it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Randomize
