office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Randomize
