just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Randomize
