He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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