I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
pray to the hookup gods
and you fell through a lawn chair
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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