two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
