Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
and she was petting her beer can
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
