I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
