what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
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