You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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