So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
