Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
