just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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