I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
