Where is the hickey?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
