Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
