My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
this will be a night to untag.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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