I'm really into asian looking animals
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Randomize
