just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
so explain again why im purple
no
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Randomize
