i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
