if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
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