At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dignity is for republicans.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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