You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
