Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract. http://tfl.nu/wrx8
  Replies (26) Good night (593) Bad night (2809) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed http://tfl.nu/k0bk
  Replies (33) Good night (557) Bad night (3450) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup. http://tfl.nu/dh7x
  Replies (39) Good night (574) Bad night (3419) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left. http://tfl.nu/zkuy
  Replies (20) Good night (1430) Bad night (5581) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen. http://tfl.nu/puzs
  Replies (27) Good night (893) Bad night (10978) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives??? http://tfl.nu/8m9c
  Replies (65) Good night (7201) Bad night (1310) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (949): I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed.. http://tfl.nu/gr14
  Replies (58) Good night (1157) Bad night (5419) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister??? http://tfl.nu/ukzw
  Replies (13) Good night (1814) Bad night (1015) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (559): Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on. http://tfl.nu/nei9
  Replies (7) Good night (900) Bad night (1440) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (417): Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off? http://tfl.nu/54ro
  Replies (4) Good night (545) Bad night (1677) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (906): Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work. http://tfl.nu/815e
  Replies (13) Good night (930) Bad night (2687) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (787): View more from Puerto Rico

  I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (787): I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers. http://tfl.nu/zztx
  Replies (1) Good night (502) Bad night (779) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart. http://tfl.nu/gryu
  Replies (12) Good night (513) Bad night (951) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (607): you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland." http://tfl.nu/m13s
  Replies (7) Good night (1391) Bad night (314) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old. http://tfl.nu/q951
  Replies (7) Good night (210) Bad night (704) Order T-Shirt

Randomize