her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
He better not be in your backpack
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
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