but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
