don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
