Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I don't think brook has ever known best
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
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I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
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We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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