i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Randomize