I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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