My hair reeks of homosexuality.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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